So what exactly do you say to girls…

  • Explain why they have a period, what exactly is happening in their body that causes them to bleed. Talk about how to keep themselves clean and how to use the products that are available to them. Talk about it in the most positive way that you can but be honest about the struggles they may have.
  • If you have/had significant cramping tell them and tell them how they could get relief. Help them to always be prepared so that they are not embarrassed because of accidents but reassure them that they may have a few accidents and that is part of it.
  • Included the changes to their breasts and that they could be sensitive but not to be alarmed.
  • This would also be a good time to talk about body odor, body hair and acne and how to handle these things. What products to use and how to use them.

What to say boys…

  • Again talk about what is happening inside their body. Talk about erections and that it’s related to excitement and how the erection actually happens because of increased blood flow. Talk about the semen that comes out with ejaculation and that they could get erections randomly or without much thought for a while but that it’s normal although it could be embarrassing.
  • Cover body odor, body hair and acne and their voice getting deeper and why that happens.

You should also talk about your beliefs about God or your spirituality here and about loving themselves and their bodies.

For more information go to my radio show, “Parent Talk with Kary” on

About Kary Vadles Therapy Sessions

kary valdesMy therapy sessions focus on the family system as a whole. I see the child as my client but see the family as having a huge role in the success of the child and therapy.

I receive most of my continuing education training in subjects related to children specifically. I use sand tray play, play therapy, art therapy, talk therapy and any other type of interaction that will motivate the child to process, think and get through any troubles they are having.

I teach relaxation techniques and educate the family about techniques that would benefit the family system and not just the identified client.

Each session will involve a parent depending on the age of the client. How long the parent is in the room will be decided during the session. The parent will then be excused to the waiting area while I meet with the client alone or the child may be excused to the waiting while I meet with the parent alone.

The fastest, most successful clients have supportive parents that embrace the therapeutic process with the child.

My focus is helping parents and their children find solutions. With experienced intervention, your child can be a happier more confident individual, and your family can become a closer, more mutually supportive unit. There is no need to struggle alone; with help, things can change for the better, and you can resolve those nagging concerns.